Road to Rio
by therobotchicken
Summary: The entire town of Ponyville wakes up after a day of widespread nasal congestion to find that everypony has been turned into their opposite gender selves. Twilight and her friends must travel to Rio de Janeighro to get Zecora, Aloe, and Lotus to fix this.


**Well, here's my first FiMfic. I have no idea how good this is or will be in the end, since I haven't even planned this out. I just started it on a whim and felt like publishing it here. This will also be available on FiMfiction at therobotchicken and on deviantart at Cuber4x4. I hope you enjoy.**

It was a rather unusual day. A strong gust of wind had been blowing in from the Everfree Forest all day. Everypony knew that the weather there was unnatural so they assumed it just happened to be blowing at them.

It all seemed harmless, but with the wind came a common inconvenience: allergies. Five seconds couldn't pass without somepony sneezing and quickly being told "Bless you."

Rarity walked slowly to the Ponyville spa for her weekly treatment. It was dry outside, so she figured that there was nothing stopping or at least hindering whatever pollen was coming in from the forest. She figured maybe getting somewhere steamy, namely the sauna, would rid her of her nasal congestion.

She was greatly disappointed when she reached the spa, though. The sign read, "Closed".

"Oh no," Rarity said. "Oh no no no no! This cannot be! Perhaps I've come too early!" She read the hours listed on the door. They were definitely closed during an hour during which they should be open. She sneezed and looked at the other sign on the door. It was a mouthwritten note from Aloe. It said:

_We are terribly sorry for the inconvenience this may cause for any of our loyal customers. But due to a lack of care in keeping record of our herb supply, we have run out of herbs to mix into our solutions. In order to fix this problem, we have gone to Rio de Janeighro with Zecora to restock. It's much quicker than waiting for the ingredients to be mailed to us. Plus, Zecora will be showing us some new and possibly better herbs. We can't say exactly when we'll be back, but we hope to be back within two weeks. Again, we apologize for the inconvenience._

_Aloe & Lotus_

Rarity read the note over again a few times before coming to terms with the lack of a return date.

"No no no no no," she said again, " this _will _not do." She turned away from the spa and started walking away. "How could they leave right on my spa day? It's inexcusable!" As she walked, she took a look back at the spa "Talk about poor customer service..." she huffed.

* * *

"Twilight, what's with all the wind today?" Spike asked in a nasally voice. He had stuffed his nostrils with tissues to block out the pollen. "Everypony's so miserable."

Twilight looked up at him from the book she was reading. "Well, the wind is coming from the Everfree Forest. I don't know if this is something annual or what."

"It isn't," Rainbow Dash said. Twilight and Spike looked at her. They hadn't bothered asking her, because they thought she'd be too engrossed in the book she was reading to care to answer. "This is the first time I-I-I- ACHOO!"

"Bless you," Spike and Twilight said together. Twilight magicked a tissue over to her.

Rainbow sniffled and took the tissue. "Thanks. Anyway, this is the first time I've seen this happen. I don't know about everypony else."

"Hm. I wonder why it's doing it now. Can't you and the other pegasi make some wind to blow the pollen out or make it more humid?" Twilight said.

"No can do, Twilight. It's not on our schedule. Today is supposed to stay dry and sunny."

"Guess we can only wait it out Spike."

Spike groaned. "This stinks," he sighed.

* * *

"Oh dear, oh dear. Pinkie, turn up the steam!" Fluttershy ordered. Her cottage was full of afflicted animals who had come to her in search of a way to get rid of their congestion.

"You got it, Fluttershy!" Pinkie replied from the bathroom. The steam filling the cottage became even thicker. But it didn't seem to be doing much to help.

"Pinkie, it's not working!" She lied down next to the Angel, who was overacting. He had a thermometer in his mouth, he was covered with a blanket, and his tongue hung lazily from his mouth.

"Hold on, Fluttershy, I think I know what to do! I'll be right back." Pinkie ran out the door to Sugar Cube Corner to get a bunch of fans to blow out the pollen.

* * *

"For the last time, Applebloom," Applejack said as she bucked a tree, "ya ain't sick. It's just some allergies."

"But what if there's some sort of disease goin' around?" Applebloom asked. She gasped, thinking up something. "Hey, Applejack! Ya think maybe my talent could be curin' ponies of diseases?" she suggested excitedly.

"The further ya stay from medical supplies, the better," Applejack mumbled as she hauled a tub of apples with her teeth.

"Beg your pardon?"

Applejack let go. "Uh, nothin'. But Ah don't think that's it. Like Ah've said before, just wait for it. It'll come when it's time." If Applejack had a bit for every time she'd told her sister that...

...

The first thing Twilight heard the next morning was Spike's groaning. Was it her, or did he sound a little different? she wondered. She had heard him moan in his sleep many times before, and he sounded a little higher than what she believed was usual. Well, yesterday she had been listening to a more nasally version of him, so that may have been it.

"Twilight? Huh, that's weird. Do I always sound like this?"

It wasn't just her. She gave the "I don't know" mumble. Her eyes shot open to the sound of her own voice.

Spike quickly sat up in his bed and looked up at Twilight, who also looked down at him.

"AAAH!" they both screamed at the sight of each other.

They both looked in the mirror across from Twilight's bed. "AAAH!" they screamed again at the sight of themselves.

They both ran to the mirror to make sure they weren't just seeing things.

"W-what's happening, Twilight? Why am I girl? And w-why are you a boy?" Spike asked.

"I-I don't know. I don't know why. Or how!" Twilight looked at himself for a few more seconds, examining his mane and facial features. He jumped when he heard a few screams from other houses in Ponyville. A few more screams, mostly masculine, resonated every few seconds after that.

Twilight stood still for a moment to think, taking it all in. Then he thought of something. "Hold on a second!" he exclaimed before running downstairs to a bookshelf.

"What is it, Twilight?" Spike asked, following him.

"I think I know what's causing this," Twilight told her as he pulled a blue book from the bookshelf. He flipped through the pages with his magic and stopped on a page titled "Poison Joke". He mumbled to himself quietly as he scanned the page for the information he was looking for. "'Poison joke can choose what ailments it wants to afflict. But it is not considered sentient.'" He mumbled again for a few seconds. "'It is not the plant itself that causes ailments but its pollen.'" Twilight looked at Spike.

"So what does it mean?"

"Don't you get it, Spike? That wind from the Everfree forest? All the pollen in the air? There must have been poison joke pollen in there! _That's _why this is happening!"

"So all we have to do is get Aloe and Lotus to fix this again, right? Zecora gave them the recipe for the cure, didn't she?"

"Yeah, that's it! Come on, Spike!" They quickly ran out the door and in to the chaos outside.

Outside, pretty much everypony in town was in a panic, running in every direction. There wasn't a doubt in Twilight's mind that every single Ponyville citizen had been affected the same way.

Along the way, they ran into a very familiar-looking pink stallion. Said stallion was bouncing up and down cheerfully. "Hey, guys! How's it going?" he asked them.

"Pinkie, is that you?" Spike asked.

"The one and only!" Pinkie answered, still bouncing up and down. "Oh, it looks like you two got 63'd too!"

"Sixty-whated?" Spike asked.

"No time to ask right now, Spike. We have to get things back to normal as soon as possible. Pinkie, follow us." Twilight ran past Pinkie, and he and Spike followed.

"So where are we going, you two?" Pinkie asked as he bounced alongside Twilight.

"We need to get Aloe and Lotus to make the cure for this."

"Oh, they're not here right now. They're on vacation or something."

Twilight skidded to a halt. "WHAT?" he and Spike both yelled.

"Yeah, they went to Rio de Janeighro to get some more herbs. That's what Rarity told me yesterday."

"Then we'll have to go get Zecora!"

"No sir-ee! She went with them!"

"...You're kidding me, right?"

Just then, they heard an ear-piercingly loud scream among all the others. Though the pitch was significantly lower, they could tell this one was Rarity's.

Twilight broke into another run. "Maybe she has the recipe!"

Pinkie caught up to him. "What makes you think that, Twilight?" she asked.

"Rarity goes to the spa all the time! She probably knows it!"

"Okie dokie lokie! Well, if that works out, I'll be at Sugar Cube Corner playing with the foals! If you get that recipe, just make sure you come to me last!" Pinkie said before bouncing away merrily.

Twilight kicked open the door to Carousel Boutique. He noticed that his legs were a little more powerful than before. Just another effect of the poison joke. "Rarity! Are you okay?" Twilight wasn't sure why he asked this, since this must have been a nightmare for her.

"No, Twilight! No, I am _not_ okay!" a stallion version of Rarity said as he wept on his sulking couch. "I mean, just look at me!" Rarity gestured to himself, and a large mirror zoomed over to him. "I'm... I'm... an uncouth stallion!" He cried even harder.

Twilight looked at Spike when he heard her sniffle. "What are _you_ crying for?"

Spike wiped a tear from her eye. "Oh, Rarity..." She hopped down from Twilight's back and ran to Rarity.

"No, Spike!" Rarity yelled as he rolled over to face the back of the couch and rolled himself into a ball. "You two mustn't see me like this..."

Twilight cut in to their moment. "But, Rarity, we need to know if you have the recipe for the cure to poison joke."

"I don't, Twilight... Why would I? Even if I did have it, what good would it do?"

"Because that's what's causing all this! The wind yesterday blew a bunch of the poison jokes' pollen into town! But without Aloe, Lotus, or Zecora, there's nothing we can do!"

Rarity quickly sat up. "Oh, don't remind me about them. Just yesterday, I went out for my weekly spa treatment only to find out that they weren't even there!"

"I know, I know," Twilight said. "Pinkie already told us. But do you know when they'll be back?"

Rarity sniffled before saying, "No."

Twilight's heart sunk. "We're doomed," he said frankly.

"W-well, can't we just wait for them to come back?" Spike asked.

"But we don't know when that'll be," Twilight told her. "And have you seen everypony outside? They've all gone crazy. I can't imagine what'll happen in the next few days, not knowing when things can go back to normal."

"So what should we do?" Rarity asked. "Do we try making a cure ourselves without the recipe?"

"No. Too risky," Twilight answered. He stood up. "We're gonna have to find them ourselves."

"Huh?" said Rarity and Spike.

"If we want to turn everypony back to normal as soon as possible, we have to go find them ourselves. Come on, Spike. Pack your things, Rarity."

Spike hopped back on to Twilight's back. "Come by my place when you're ready, Rarity!" Twilight said before running out the door.

As far as Twilight could tell, the chaos hadn't dissipated at all. As a matter of fact, she could have sworn that even more ponies were outside, yelling for answers, confused as to what was going on.

Upon approaching the library, Twilight saw whom he could only assume was Applejack as a stallion. He had grown a couple inches taller, about Big Macintosh's height. His hooves were also in the same style."There y'all are!" Applejack said. "Please tell me you have a spell that can fix this."

Twilight walked into the library. "I don't, Applejack. I'll explain things later. Just go get Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash for me."

"Uh, alright." Applejack ran out the door to get them.

"Alright, Spike. It might be a long trip, so we need to pack everything we can. But only things we need."

"Right!" Spike hopped down and started packing.

Twilight looked around the room and thought. Obviously, they'd need food. But how much? How long would it take for them to get to Rio de Janeighro? Perhaps they'd need money. Would they be going by train or on hoof?

Twilight pulled a copy of "An Equestria Travel Guide" from one of the shelves and pulled a folded map out of it. On the map, he put his hoof over Ponyville. Then his other front hoof went over Rio de Janeighro. With a quill and magic, he marked the fewest towns and cities in between the two locations, connecting them with lines.

Twilight groaned. "That's going to take us a while." He got up and magicked his saddle bag over to him. He put the book and map into it. He also stored the book on plants he used earlier. He quickly walked over to his desk and pulled out a small box of all his money. That also went into the saddle bag.

* * *

Applejack knocked on the door of Fluttershy's cottage. He cleared his throat before speaking. "Uh, Fluttershy? You in there?"

A soft male voice spoke up. "H-hello? Who is it?"

"It's me, Applejack."

"Oh, so I'm not the only one this has happened to?"

"Course not, sugar cube. Everypony in town's like this, and they've all gone crazier than a swarm of locusts during harvest season.

"R-really?"

"Yes. Now come on out here, we gotta get Rainbow and head on over to Twilight's place." Applejack heard Fluttershy's quiet steps come closer.

The door cracked open, and a male Fluttershy peeked outside. Startled by Applejack's appearance, she yelped and hid behind the door.

"Fluttershy. It's me," Applejack reminded her flatly.

Fluttershy opened the door again, this time more widely. She blushed. "Heh heh... Sorry..." she said quietly.

"'T's alright. Now, let's go get Rainbow." Applejack was just about to run toward Rainbow's house (which was in the sky, requiring either Pinkie or Fluttershy to reach), but stopped himself when he realized that Fluttershy didn't seem ready to follow. "Everythin' all right?" he asked him.

Fluttershy didn't answer for a few seconds. He tried to hide his face with his mane as he usually did when shy or nervous. Applejack could see that this was difficult, seeing as how his mane now covered barely anything beyond the top of his head and a bit of his eyes.

When he did answer, still trying to hide his face, he said, "I-I don't know if I should go out like this... I think I should just stay here..."

"But, Fluttershy, I need you to get Rainbow Dash! And then we might need you later on!"

"For what?"

To be perfectly honest, Applejack wasn't even sure himself. "Well, Ah dunno. Maybe if there's some sort of creature we need you to tame for us?"

Fluttershy still stood in her doorway.

"Can you at least get Rainbow for me?"

"I-I guess..." Fluttershy slowly and unsurely stepped out of his cottage.

"Yeehaw! Let's go!" Applejack ran off, full speed, this time.

Fluttershy shut the door of his cottage and sprinted to catch up to him.

* * *

"Alright, Spike, are you done packing?" Twilight asked as he finished packing his own stuff.

"Uh huh. I guess. Are we going to pick up some food along the way?" Spike asked.

Twilight threw his saddle bag onto his bed and answered her. "We'll grab a bite to eat before we leave. And then we'll pick up more food in between stops." Twilight trotted down the stairs. "I'm gonna go get Pinkie."

"I'll go with you!" Spike said, following him out the door and leaving his bags on the floor.

Sure enough, the chaos hadn't died down much, if at all, outside. Twilight, with Spike on his back, carefully ran through the crowd to Sugar Cube Corner.

They walked inside and immediately saw Pinkie playing with Pumpkin Cake and Pound Cake, who were also their opposite gender selves.

"Oh, hey, Twilight, didja find the cure? And I thought I—"

"Pinkie, I need you to come with us. Pack your things!"

"I knew you'd need me!" Pinkie said before running upstairs and back down in literally two seconds. "So I already packed a saddlebag!" Pinkie presented said saddlebag to them.

"She's certainly well prepared," Spike said.

"That's great, Pinkie, now—"Twilight started.

"And don't worry, I've got all the essentials!" Pinkie continued. He started pulling a number of items (that should have been impossible to fit) from the bag and naming them off. "Money! A map! Cake! Cupcakes! Some punch in case we get thirsty along the way!"

"Alright, Pinkie, you don't need to tell me! Just follow me!" Twilight ran out the door, and Pinkie followed with his saddle bag on.

"Alright, here we are, Fluttershy. Now just go up there and get Rainbow Dash, and we'll be on our way."

* * *

"Um. Okay," Fluttershy said. He spread his wings and slowly flew up to Rainbow Dash's house in the sky. He looked in the window and saw Rainbow Dash sleeping soundly in her—now his—bed. He didn't seem disturbed by all the screaming going on in Ponyville. Fluttershy coughed lightly to get Rainbow's attention, but he remained asleep. Fluttershy climbed in through the window and in to Rainbow's bedroom. He walked over to the bed and tapped Rainbow Dash on the shoulder. "Um. Excuse me. Rainbow Dash? I need you to come with me."

Rainbow Dash opened his eyes. Seeing a stallion he didn't know, he jumped out of bed, which startled Fluttershy.

Hovering above Fluttershy, Rainbow asked, "Who the hay are you, and what are you doing in _my_ house?" But then he noticed how different he sounded from usual. "Ah! What happened to my voice? What did you do to me?"

Fluttershy backed himself against the wall, trembling. "I-I didn't do anything. It's me, Fluttershy."

"Do I look stupid to you? Fluttershy's a girl!" Rainbow Dash paused for a moment. "Hold on a sec." Rainbow Dash flew to a mirror and lowered himself to eye level. He examined his new appearance and was awestruck. "Whoa... I. Look. Awesome," he said. Then he turned back to Fluttershy. "B-But what's going on, Fluttershy? Why are we stallions?"

Fluttershy stood up. "I don't really know. Applejack just came to my house and told me that we have to go to Twilight."

"Well, then what're we waiting for? Let's go!" Rainbow Dash quickly flew out the window. She landed in front of Applejack, and Fluttershy landed next to Rainbow.

"Howdy, Rainbow," Applejack greeted him.

"Hey, Applejack," Rainbow replied. "Hey, that's not fair! Why are _you_ taller than us?"

"Ah reckon it's because I'm the toughest out of all of us," Applejack boasted.

"Is that so?" They glared at each other for a couple seconds before Fluttershy butted in.

"Um, Applejack? Don't we need to go to Twilight?"

"Oh, yeah, that's right. We can settle this later, Rainbow Dash, but for now, we gotta get a move on!"

* * *

"Geez all this screaming and yelling is too much! We have to calm them down!" Twilight yelled to the Pinkie.

"Leave it to me, Twilight!" Pinkie took off his saddlebag and threw it onto Twilight, practically crushing him beneath it's weight.

Twilight saved himself by using his magic to carry it. "How... did she carry this?" he asked rhetorically in between pants.

"I think it's better that we don't question it. Mare or stallion, Pinkie Pie is still Pinkie Pie."

Pinkie quickly walked up a pole and produced a megaphone from thin air. He cleared his throat and spoke. "Good morning, everypony, this is is your resident party-loving Pinkie Pie here," his voice rang around the block. "Now if you would all be so kind, AND SHUT UP! TWILIGHT HAS SOMETHING TO SAY!"

Everypony immediately covered their ears and didn't uncover them until they were either sure the ringing had stopped or until they saw somepony else uncover theirs.

Pinkie jumped down from the pole and walked back to Twilight. Twilight uncovered his ears and gave Pinkie a distasteful look. Pinkie hoofed the speaker to him."Here you go!"

"Thanks, Pinkie." Twilight let the speaker float in front of him. He cleared his throat before speaking. "Sorry about that, everypony. So. As I'm sure you've all noticed, things... They're not quite right..."

"Oh, really?" somepony yelled out from the crowd. "Well, do you have anything useful to say, like how to fix this?"

"As a matter of fact, I do," Twilight answered surely. "Remember how yesterday there was a bunch of wind coming from the Everfree forest?" A collection of 'yeah' variations sounded among the crowd, but quickly died down as Twilight spoke again. "Well, all that wind was blowing a bunch of poison joke pollen into town. That's what was making everypony sneeze."

A minty-green unicorn raised his hand. "Yes, uh, Lyra? You have a question?"

"That's right. Um, what's poison joke?" Lyra asked.

"Remember that time Zecora came to town, and my friends and I were supposedly cursed? Well, that was actually caused by poison joke. It's a plant that likes to play practical jokes on anypony who comes into contact with its pollen."

"But how do we fix it?" asked a stallion next to Lyra who Twilight could tell was Bon Bon. "Do you have a spell or something?"

"I'm afraid I don't," Twilight began. "Zecora, Aloe, and Lotus are the only ones who know the cure. But they're all out of town right now."

"When will they be back then?"

"I can't say. They were just here two days ago, so they must have just left."

"Then what do we do?" Bon Bon asked him.

"Don't you worry, I'm already assembling a team of my closest friends to help me find them and bring them back ASAP. We should be able to leave within an hour or two."

"Well, how long will it take for you all to get back?" somepony else asked.

"I can almost guarantee that we'll be able to get them back faster than if we don't go at all. But until we get back, I ask that you all remain calm and go about your usual business. Just pretend things are just how they always are, and we'll have Zecora, Aloe, and Lotus back here before you know it!"

The entire town began to chatter unsurely. They wanted to get back to normal as soon as possible, but this seemed to be the quickest way to doing so.

"So can you do that?" Twilight asked all of them. In a unanimous answer, they all contributed an 'uh huh'. "Good," Twilight said. "Just go about your usual business for now." He hoofed the speaker back to Pinkie and gave him back his saddle bag. Pinkie stored the speaker in it.

"So what now, Twilight?" Spike asked.

"We wait for Applejack and the others to come to the library. We'd better head over there now."

"Okie dokie lokie!" Pinkie said cheerfully as he followed Twilight and Spike.

...

Twilight was glad to have been able to calm things down. It was so much easier to relax when the entire town _wasn't _yelling their heads off. Pinkie and Spike were in the middle of devouring the cake Pinkie had packed, and Twilight was, of course, reading a book.

There was a knock on the door. "Come in," Twilight said.

The door opened, and Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, and Applejack walked in. They all gave their own greetings, and Twilight gave her own, as did Pinkie with his mouth stuffed with cake.

"Oh, so this is what you two look like. You guys look alright, I guess. But I still look the best as a stallion," Rainbow said.

Fluttershy remained quiet, embarrassed by his appearance.

"Well, it looks like the town's finally simmered down," Applejack said.

"Uh huh," Twilight said.

"You're welcome!" Pinkie added with pride.

"So are we just—" Applejack was interrupted by Rainbow Dash laughing hysterically.

"Oh, wow! This is just too good! Spike got turned into a girl! BAHAHAHAHA!"

Spike started eating faster.

"Where are we going to, Twilight?" Fluttershy asked.

"We're going to Rio de Janeighro," Twilight answered. "If there's a train available, we can take that, and it'll be much faster."

"And we're just waiting for Rarity, right?" Applejack asked, looking around.

"Yeah. But she was the first one I went to, so I don't know what's taking her so long." Twilight quickly stood up. "Actually, I think I know the problem. Go home, pack your things, and meet me back here when you're done." The tip of Twilight's horn glowed pink. The aura around it exploded in a bright flash, and he was gone.

Twilight materialized in Rarity's room. He couldn't believe his eyes. He had suspected it, but he still couldn't believe it.

Rarity was still sulking on his couch. Apparently, he'd been crying so much that tear stains were now visibly running down the couch and onto the floor.

Twilight felt no sympathy, though. "You still haven't packed! Rarity, stop sulking, and pack your things! We're going to fix this!"

"But how can I show my face outside like this?"

"Trust me, Rarity, you look fine. You're not the only one who's like this. It's happened to the entire town. And besides, I doubt anypony outside of Ponyville will be able to recognize you."

Rarity sniffed. "You think so?"

"Yes, I do. Now, puh-lease, get your things, so we can get going."

Rarity slowly sat up and stepped off of the couch. "Oh, alright." Rarity trudged over to the stairs and went up to his room to get his saddlebag and travel essentials.

About five minutes later, Rarity came back down to Twilight. He was inspecting himself in a small mirror. He seemed to have cheered up a little. His eyes were at least dry.

"Are you ready?" Twilight asked him.

"Uh huh," Rarity answered looking at his face in the mirror from every possible angle. "I must say, Twilight, you were right. I do look rather stunning."

"Yeah, that's nice. Now let's go to the library. We have to meet the others there."

Rarity followed Twilight the entire way, with the mirror floating beside him, occasionally sneaking a look at himself. As they walked through town, Twilight noticed others staring at them, whispering to others around them, most likely wondering what was taking them so long to leave town. They picked up the pace.

They entered the library to see that Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, and Applejack had already gotten back with their saddlebags and were waiting with Pinkie Pie and Spike, who lay on the floor, having finished the cake.

"Alright, so we're all finally here," Twilight said huffily. It had been such a pain to assemble the group.

"Uh huh," everypony and Spike said.

"And you've got all your things?"

"Uh huh," they said again.

Twilight sat down to relax a little. She magicked the map over to himself from the saddlebag and started briefing them on their mission. "Alright, gir—er, guys. We need to go to Rio de Janeighro, which is where Aloe, Lotus, and Chloe are. Right, Pinkie and Rarity?"

With an "Mm-hm", Pinkie and Rarity nodded.

"Well that sounds easy," Rainbow Dash said, looking up from a Daring Do novel. "Just go there and back. It'll be a snap!"

Twilight stared at him blankly. "You don't know where Rio is, do you?"

"Um... No." Rainbow answered.

Twilight levitated the map over to him, practically shoving in his face. "We have to go from here," Twilight said, pointing at Ponyville on the map with a quill, "through these towns, find Zecora, Aloe, and Lotus, and come back here."

"Oh..." Rainbow said.

Twilight folded the map and shoved it back into his saddlebag.

"Are there any questions?" Twilight asked of the group.

Fluttershy was the first to raise his hoof. "Um, yes, Twilight. Um, do I have to go?"

"Well, we might have to go through a forest on the way there. We might need your expertise with animals in there."

"Oh, um, okay..." Fluttershy was too timid to try to argue with him.

"Any others?" Twilight asked. The room stood silent. "Good. Now let's go to the train station."

"Yes sir, Commander Dusk Shine, sir! Pinkie suddenly yelled.

For a second, Twilight walked toward the door. But he quickly turned around and asked, "What did you just call me?"

"Oh, I forgot! Since we're all stallions now, I gave you all new stallion names! I thought they might come in handy!" Pinkie jumped over to Twilight. "You're Dusk Shine." He zipped over to Rainbow Dash. "You're Rainbow Blitz!" To Fluttershy. "You're Butterscotch!" To Spike. "And you're Barbara!" To Rarity. "You're Elusive!" Then he stood in the center of the room. "And I've saved the best for last! _I'm_ Bubble Berry!"

Rainbow Dash let out a loud snicker.

"Then what about me?" Applejack asked.

Pinkie looked back at him. "Oh, I couldn't come up with anything for you, Applejack. You're name is fine the way it is!"

"Alright, then."

Pinkie kept going. "And of course it wouldn't be fair if I just gave _us_ nicknames! I've come up with names for almost everypony in Ponyville! You know how Vinyl Scratch's stage name is DJ-Pon3? Well now she can be DJ-Bron3! Or DJ-Col7! I like 'em both!"

Twilight rolled her eyes, wanting to get a move on.

Pinkie continued. "And Lyra can be Guyra. And Big Macintosh can be Macareina! Doctor can be the Professor, since, you know, that's more gender neutral! And—" Pinkie was suddenly jerked by his tail.

"Alright, Pinkie," Twilight began, horn glowing, "you can finish telling us all about it later. But we have to get going now."

Still being dragged along by the tail, Pinkie blinked twice. "Derpy can be Dopey. And—"

"I said later, Pinkie. Come on everypony. We have to hurry."

"Hey, Twilight," Rainbow Dash said, "don't you have the book that has the cure?"

"I do, but I don't know where to get the ingredients. If they had to go to Rio, then the ingredients must not be here."

The group galloped out of the library and headed toward the train station.

...

"Oh, you've got to be kidding me. You have _got _to be kidding me..." Twilight heaved disbelievingly.

They all stared at the sign posted on the window to the ticket master's office. The train service in Ponyville had been closed for the week.

"My, my. Surely I'm not the only one who is beginning to think that fate is just conspiring against us," Rarity said.

"I think we're all with you there, Rarity," Spike replied.

"Mm-hm," the others agreed.

"But we're still going aren't we?" Rainbow Dash asked.

Twilight let out a huge sigh. "Well, we have to. I promised everypony in town that we'd leave soon and bring them back. I was hoping the train could speed things up, but now it looks like we're going to have to go there on hoof." Twilight brought out the map and a compass. "Alright, so if Canterlot is there," he mumbled, "and we have to go south..." Twilight turned. "Alright, we need to go that way. You all ready?"

An 'uh huh' resonated from the rest of the group.

"Alright. Let's go. To Rio de Janeighro."

The entire group took off on the path to the first town. Appleloosa.

Pinkie gasped. "Isn't that great, Applejack!"

"What're you talking about, Pinkie?" Applejack asked.


End file.
